Sunday, January 8, 2012

Tebow unleashed: Broncos kick Steelers out of playoffs, 29-23 in OT

It may not be the worst playoff loss in Steelers postseason history (see Chargers 17, Steelers 13, AFC Championship Game, Jan. 15, 1995 et al), but it was certainly one of the most shocking, and perhaps, THE most embarrassing.  It was shocking because the game ended on the first play from scrimmage in overtime with an 80-yard touchdown pass from Tim Tebow.  It was embarrassing for many more reasons that happened to be forecast by the Magic Cuss Ball in the Steeler Face's game preview earlier this week:


"Magic Cuss Ball . . . foresees the ill effects of many injuries, an offense struggling to score points, a defense struggling to force turnovers, inexcusable piss poor clock management (an ongoing weakness of Coach Tomlin), and of course, biased officiating . . ."


But before the Steeler Face runs down the litany of blame for Pittsburgh's disappointing defeat, he must first and foremost congratulate Tim Tebow and the Denver Broncos . . .


Tip of the hat: 
The Denver Broncos were the better team today and they deserved to win.  They were better prepared, better coached, and most importantly they out-played Pittsburgh.  They beat the Steelers, and nobody can take that away from them.  All week the Broncos took a pile of crap from everyone: odds makers, the media, and even some of their own fans.  Nobody thought Denver had it in them, and the Broncos proved them all wrong.  Tebow completed 10 of 21 passes for a ridiculous 316 yards and 2 TDs, and scored a rushing TD.  He played the game of his life and deserves the glory tonight.  Good job, congratulations, now, please go the same thing to the New England Cheatriots.


Shame and blame:
And now, in no special order, are the many reasons for Pittsburgh to feel bad about this one . . .
  • The second quarter: The Steelers drove the ball down field and scored on their first two possessions of the game.  The problem is that Pittsburgh scored FGs and not TDs.  Denver went three-and-out on its first two possessions and the look in Tebow's eye sitting on the sideline in the first quarter seemed to be quiet acceptance of what everyone thought would happen.  But, instead of shutting the door on the Broncos early, the Steelers meager 6-0 lead at the end of the first quarter let Denver hang around to the second.  On third-and-12 from his own 18-yard line, Tebow moved his team 82 yards in just two pass plays for a 7-6 lead.  Uh-oh.  And three minutes later on a second-and-7, Tebow completed a 58-yard pass play that would set up his 9-yard TD run on a quarterback draw.  Just like that it was 14-6 in favor of the Broncos.  Not to be outdone (at least at the time) by his defensive teammates, Big Ben threw an atrocious interception that gave the Broncos possession deep in Steelers territory, which would result in a Denver field goal.  At one point in the second quarter Roethlisberger went 0-for-7 passing with an INT (and it should have been 0-for-8 with two consecutive INTs because he threw another one on his very next pass attempt that was nullified by an offsides penalty against the Broncos).  By halftime Pittsburgh trailed 20-6 and Brett Kiesel and Big Snack had been lost to injuries.
  • The bubble screen: I hate this play call with the white intensity of a thousand suns.  Please, Bruce Arians (if you are still the Steelers offensive coordinator next year) abolish this useless freaking gimmick from the play book.  It hasn't worked since the 1990s and it even sucked then too.  Its high risk for very little reward.  If Napoleon had tried to conquer the world in football he would have called for a bubble screen in Waterloo. 
  • The offensive line: Why is it that Tim Tebow can get enough pass protection to find the Dead Sea Scrolls, and Big Ben cannot even get the snap before being swallowed by defenders?  Oh, because our offensive line sucks.  These guys couldn't even block a tax bill with a filibuster in a Republican controlled Congress.
  • No pass rush: I know Kiesel and Hampton were out, but where in the wide world of sports was Woodley, Farrior, Hood, or Harrison?  I know you were being held on every play, but Tebow wasn't sacked even once. 
  • Steeler-hating-officiating: No, the officials did not cost Pittsburgh the game.  Denver beat the Steelers, and beat them badly.  That said, there seems to be two rule books: there is the "NFL rule book" and then there is the "NFL rule book for Steeler games."  Unfortunately, the latter one continues to be used when the Steelers are playing.  Again, this is not an excuse.  The Steelers should be well accustomed to this rule book by now as its used for each game they play.  In fact, Pittsburgh has managed to win more Super Bowls than any other team in spite of the imbalance caused by the use of this rule book.  However, one Steeler fan does get tired of seeing our pass rushers being held on every single play without a single holding penalty ever being called.  Once.  Or, how about the helmet-to-helmet collisions on Steeler receivers, especially the one that ended a key drive in the first half.  All I'm saying is-CALL IT BOTH WAYS.
  • The secondary: I know Ryan Clark was missing, but Ike Taylor and William Gay played the absolute worst games of their lives today.  Getting beat that many times in one game by a QB who was considered the worst passer in the league should make one wonder about their ability to play that position next season.  Either that, or our defensive coordinator drew up the worst pass defense schemes ever (which, unfortunately, might also be the case).  And that brings me to the big one . . .
  • Coaching and lack thereof: John Fox drew up a game plan to attack the Steelers secondary and Tomlin (and LeBeau) did not have a plan to stop Tebow.  Moreover, as absolutely predicted by the Steeler Face, Tomlin exercised "inexcusable piss poor inexcusable clock management."  Or, as I put it during the game: "CALL A FREAKING TIME OUT!"  The Steelers get ball with over a minute and a half to go in the game AND TWO TIME OUTS.  We had just scored 17 points in about 15 minutes to overcome a 20-6 halftime deficit.  With Ben's dramatic 31-yard TD strike to tie the game at 23-23 with minutes to go, we had all the momentum on our side.  Tebow was sitting on the sideline with nearly the same look he had in the first quarter.  The time to win the game is NOW.  This is our chance.  Ben makes a long pass completion for a first down with 58 seconds to go . . . and 25 seconds expire before another pass play . . . and then Tomlin calls time out.  To top it off Tomlin uses our last timeout after the clock was already stopped.  Keeping those 25 seconds (rather than watching them needlessly expire) would have given us ample opportunity to at least play for a field goal at the end of the game, rather than trying to heave a Hail Mary toward the end zone.  Am I saying Tomlin should be fired?  Of course not.  In five seasons under Tomlin, Pittsburgh has made the playoffs four times, including two trips to the Super Bowl and one championship.  However, we all have weaknesses, and this is merely healthy criticism about one of Tomlin's.  I have seen Tomlin do this countless times throughout the past five years (including most recently at the end of the first half against Cleveland in all most identical circumstances).  The result in that game was a FG instead of a TD before halftime.  This time, the consequences were much more severe.  I would hereby like to personally invite Coach Tomlin to a clinic entitled: "Timeouts: Theories, functions, when to call them and why."
  • Injuries: The numerous injuries and inactives cannot be ignored, nor overstated: Big Ben, Rashard Mendenhall, Mewelde Moore, Jonathan Dwyer, Brett Keisel, Casey Hampton, Ryan Clark, Maurkice Pouncy, Aaron Smith, running back coach, and water boy #2.  Big Ben sure could have used the rest before this game.  Too bad Tomlin didn't let Charlie Batch handle Cleveland.
Okay, now that I've purged that from my system.  Here are some other notables (some good, and some bad) following today's game:
  • The Steeler Face's new TV that was 6-0 in the regular season is now 0-1 in the playoffs.
  • Big Ben is 10-4 in playoff games, but his last two have been losses, and that's too bad.  Roethlisberger almost had another brilliant comeback win. Playing with a broken thumb on his throwing hand and high ankle sprain, Big Ben led the Steelers back from a 20-6 halftime deficit by making plays with his feet and his arm.  His game-tying 31-yard touchdown strike came after Ben scrambled out of the pocket and threw on the run.  If Tomlin had managed to call a timeout with 58 second to go, Ben might have won another.
  • Isaac Redman carried the ball 17 times for 112 yards, and might push Rashard Mendenhall for the starting job next year.


Okay.  It is late, and I'm tired.  More to follow later . . .


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